To an Old Mentor, with Great Love and Appreciation
Just a bit less than one year ago, I posted this entry after finding out that a cherished mentor had left this plane of existence. I am re-posting what I wrote then, as his influence in my life is far from over. Every time I shuffle a deck of Tarot cards, I think of him, and bless the day he first singled me out and spoke to me. I can’t even begin to express the importance of what he did for me; words are insufficient.
This wonderful man was the very first person who read my cards for me, with a Waite deck that had belonged to his grandmother. He gave me an amazing reading, full of hope and validation, and told me that someday I would become a very fine reader myself.
I had the great satisfaction of returning to him some years later, and reading his cards- and to my immense gratification, he was very impressed with the quality and depth of my readings for him. Over time, we traded readings, and his accuracy was beyond compare! I have always aspired to be as good a reader, and as upright a human being as he was. He set the bar very high indeed!
I wrote this memorial in his honor, as I remembered all the many great and small gestures of kindness and support I received from him through the years:
Dear Doc-
I knew you had left this plane of existence on some level of my being- I could feel the absence of your laughter in the sudden stillness of the present day.
You probably had some small idea of how important you were in my life, but not the whole of it. In fact, you kept me alive. I would have slid into surrender, the rapid beating of my mind gone forever under the iron tide of aggressive conformity. It was you who first told me that I was special, and encouraged me to fight my way back to the surface again and again to light and air, until I could win my way free of the forces that held me down. You couldn’t know- I had no way to tell you- (I was a child still, and didn’t understand it myself)- I didn’t know that I was drowning, even when you held my head up above the waves and shouted for me to
“Breathe, damn you, breathe! Don’t let the bastards win!â€
Thank you Doctor George, for doing so much more than you ever knew. I will always treasure the friendship you gave so freely, without agenda, without thought of gain for yourself.
Love Always- Anita
Travel well, old teacher and soul-friend, into that unknown country were we will all someday follow.
I hope I am fortunate enough to find you there when it is my time.